Five things I regret

Reflections on my first pregnancy journey

I put the last of the freshly washed newborn onesies into the drawer, pressed it shut, and stepped back to take the moment in. Over eight months of growing a tiny human, my first baby, and suddenly it was almost time to meet them.

These last few weeks have felt slow and sentimental. I bounce between being so ready to hold my baby in my arms and being completely freaked out that I will be responsible for raising another human being. Many hours have been spent on the couch just reflecting back on my pregnancy journey and everything that has happened. In a way, this experience has already changed me forever.

When I cast my mind back to July 2025, I instantly see those tiny pink lines. I enjoyed those quiet moments before anyone else knew. I held my stomach and told myself not to get too excited in case something happens and it goes away. I’m no stranger to the reality that the possibility of early miscarriage is unfortunately common these days. I didn’t allow myself to be excited… yet.

Then I told my husband over pancakes. I showed him the tests. He couldn’t believe it at first either. We celebrated anyway and slowly but surely I came around to the idea that our little baby was on their way to us. Now, they’re almost here.

Pregnancy has slowly unravelled layers of myself I didn’t realise I was hiding beneath. It has clarified what’s really important to me. I’ve learned more about myself in the last few months than I have in the last decade — and that’s saying something because six years ago I quit drinking, which was a massive life change for me.

I’ve been thinking about who I was in July and who I am now, and everything I’ve managed to go through in between. I know that this was my journey, our journey, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. I’m so proud of myself, but I’d be lying if I said there weren’t a few things I would do differently next time if given the opportunity.

1. I didn’t appreciate that we got pregnant so easily. Before getting pregnant, I spent a few months preparing my body. I took folate supplements, moderated my caffein, got out walking every day, and made sure I was eating healthy. We spent a few months ‘not NOT trying’ with no luck, so I decided to track my ovulation and make sure everything was working the way it should. The first time we properly tried, we got pregnant. It was something I wished for, but never expected. Even though I put in so much time and research into getting pregnant, I was completely shocked when it happened. I hadn’t thought far beyond seeing those little lines on a pregnancy test. Out of fear, I bypassed gratitude, not taking any time to properly acknowledge how amazingly capable my body was. I immediately began to worry that something would go wrong. I was so hesitant to celebrate and for months I didn’t even believe it was real. Looking back, I wish I had been more appreciative of my body and spent some time in those early days just sitting in the quiet miracle of it all.

2. I let work stress overshadow the first half of my pregnancy. I don’t think I’ll ever fully divulge the story about work until I’ve processed through a few things, but I’ll just say this: I was not prepared for how difficult it would be to find out I was pregnant and start a new job in the same week. Even though this was my first pregnancy, it faded into the background because I was so obsessed with making sure I was doing well at my new job. My entire life revolved around managing my fatigue and appetite (thankfully no nausea) around my new work schedule. By the time I got home everyday, all I could do was eat a bowl of cereal and pass out on the sofa. This ties into the last point I made about not appreciating early pregnancy, because my immediate thought upon finding out I was pregnant was how this would affect my new job. Every minute I wasn’t working, I was stressed about working. There were days where I even forgot I was pregnant. In the end, I learned a very valuable lesson: my health and my baby’s health are more important than any job. I’m so grateful to be done working now until after maternity leave.

3. I worried constantly about gaining weight. In my first and second trimesters, I panicked so much about gaining ‘too much weight’. One of my first pregnancy symptoms was an insane increase in appetite and a distain for anything other than carbohydrates. I got dizzy if I went more than an hour without eating and always had emergency granola bars on hand everywhere I went. I was eating more than normal and I was so hard on myself about it. Even though I knew my body would change throughout pregnancy, I was afraid of putting on too much weight too soon. Before I obviously appeared pregnant with my bump, I will be honest and say I didn’t like how I looked. Thankfully once the bump came, these thoughts quietened down. I did end up putting on about 10lbs in the first few months and didn’t gain anymore weight until around six months, so everything evened out in the end. Also, even if I put on more than that, it’s normal to put on weight while you’re pregnant! Everyone kept telling me to just eat whatever I was craving, because obviously that’s what baby wanted. I wish I had just listened and not stressed so much about the weight gain. I don’t even know how much I’ve gained this far in pregnancy and now I could care less.

4. I waited too long before starting to prepare for baby’s arrival. I wrote a newsletter about this recently, but I feel like I was so afraid it was too soon to start preparing our home for baby that I accidentally left it too late. I kept telling myself that I didn’t want to jinx anything by buying things too early. Considering we did an entire makeover of our upstairs bedrooms, I underestimated how much time and effort it would take for us to get the house ready. I also developed some serious fatigue and pelvic pain towards the end of my second trimester that has only worsened. What do you think the sweet spot is for getting the nursery and baby essentials ready? I’d love to know any thoughts and advice from more experienced moms. I definitely want to start getting ready earlier if I’m so lucky to get pregnant again.

5. I didn’t buy enough maternity clothes. I had grand visions of dressing my bump and taking cute outfit of the day photos throughout my pregnancy. Yeah, that never happened. I tried a few times to order maternity clothes online and none of them fit right and it ended up being so much hassle to return them. Why are there no places to go in person and try on maternity clothes in Ireland? Since this was my first pregnancy, I found it hard to gauge how long I would fit into certain clothing and I didn’t want to spend 40 euro on a paid of maternity jeans that would only last a few weeks of my pregnancy. So after about five months, I resolved to just wearing maternity leggings, t-shirts, and long jumpers. It was winter. I was cold and sore from my pelvic pain. I resigned the dream of having amazing style during pregnancy. I still get so jealous seeing all the mamas out there living their best life and styling their bumps, but it just wasn’t feasible for me. Maybe next time.

I might follow up this post with a list of five things I don’t regret about my pregnancy journey. If you’d be interested in reading that, drop a comment and let me know!

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Thanks for reading Keep This In Mind. If you enjoyed this newsletter, I’d truly appreciate it if you subscribed, liked, shared, or left a comment. You being here means so much to me!

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If you liked this, you might enjoy other newsletters I have written about my pregnancy journey:

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*fun fact: the cover photo from this newsletter (from Pinterest; source: unknown) was actually on my vision board last year.