Spring, before everything changes
Postpartum capsule wardrobe, meal planning, household organisation, and self-compassion
Spring is arriving, my first baby is due in a matter of weeks, and I have no idea what to expect.
These final months of pregnancy have passed in a blur. I’ve been existing somewhere in between resting and nesting. Moments of sheer panic have punctuated long days of feeling calm and ready. I’ve been collecting ‘last times’ as if my life is about to be flipped upside down into another dimension. Our last trip away before baby. My last birthday before baby. Could this be my last hair cut before baby?
The stark reality that my husband and I are on the cusp of creating a brand new life (literally) is hitting hard. I feel as though I’m living inside the centre of a Venn diagram of two overlapping and extreme emotions: fear and anticipation. We’ve now stepped out of February and into March, and I felt it suddenly: the subtle shift. Winter is ending. Spring is arriving. And everything, at last, is finally about to change.
There seems to be a familiar sentimentality among pregnant women in the third trimester that we all get to a point where we are simply over being pregnant and ready to meet the little baby that’s been doing Irish jigs on our bladders. I passed through the vortex and entered into this stage about a week ago. I’m still going to do my pelvic floor exercises, take my supplements, attend my appointments, and oil my belly, but now… we’re now focusing on preparing for postpartum.
I’ve read that many women skip this stage of preparation and often regret it later. With the arrival of spring, I am genuinely excited to look forward. I’m planting seeds that will grow and bear fruit for future Melissa, who is deep in the newborn trenches, to enjoy. I’m putting in the effort now to take care of the new version of me: the mother I’m about to become. This is not the season for setting audacious goals. This is the season of tending, before everything changes.
As I said before, I really have no clue what to expect over the next few months. One thing I’ve learned so far about this pregnancy and motherhood journey is to expect the unexpected and be flexible. It’s probably going to look different than what you thought it would.
Pregnancy, for example, did not look or feel at all like what I thought it would. I had visions in my head of getting excited to dress my bump, exercising every day, getting a bit of nausea in the first trimester, and having some food cravings. I know every pregnancy is different, and every baby is different, but during this pregnancy (my first) nothing looked how I thought it would. My biggest stressors were things I never could have prepared for or predicted. The highlights were moments I never knew would even happen. I’ve just had to buckle up and go all in on this rollercoaster ride. Now I’m nearing the platform, knowing another rollercoaster is already waiting.
During these last few weeks of winter, I haven’t felt inspired to romanticise my life with all this rainy weather. However, the sun came out the other day and I suddenly became invigorated and ready to make plans for postpartum preparation. The last few evenings, I’ve thrown on a really easy to watch show (something I’ve seen a hundred times like Kitchen Nightmares) and I get out my phone to start making lists of things I can do to prepare.
So here are a few things I’ll be doing over the next few weeks to take care of future me: the most tired, overwhelmed version of myself.
Preparing for recovery
From what I’ve read, recovery from birth is no joke. I’m not talking just about the physical recovery, but mental recovery as well. I’m putting together little caddies for next to my bed to hold anything I might need as I rest and recover. I’m making sure we have dark towels, pain relief, breastfeeding snacks (hopefully), and extra sheets. I’m compiling a list of important phone numbers for mental health support. I’m also treating myself to a few nice skincare bits to help feel motivated to take extra care of myself during this time.
Division of household tasks
I’ve heard it’s good to discuss the division of household tasks with your partner before baby comes. My husband and I split most household tasks equally, but I’m definitely more involved in the day to day minutiae of our lives (meal planning, food shopping, cooking, laundry). These are things I won’t be up for doing after giving birth. However, I’m so grateful that my mom is coming to stay with us for a few weeks when the baby arrives to help out. I’ve been writing out detailed notes on how to use the dishwasher, washing machine, coffee machine, and other little processes to keep the house running smoothly while I’m resting and recovering with baby.
Creating a postpartum capsule wardrobe
I’m getting my postpartum wardrobe ready to go so I’m not rustling through drawers and bags after giving birth. I’ve created a little ‘postpartum capsule wardrobe’ and will slowly start hanging everything up and getting everything washed and organised so it’s easy to get dressed in those early weeks.
Stocking up on household essentials
This is something I would like to do, but I’m not going to be overly upset if I don’t get around to it. I’m ordering extra shampoo, skincare, toothpaste, detergent, and dog food so we don’t run out of everyday things we need and stress ourselves out.
Preparing food
I’ve created a list in my notes app of really easy foods I enjoy for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks. These are things I know I’ll actually eat and most things can be eaten one handed (a pro tip I’ve received from experienced moms). I’m also prepping some easy meals and lactation snacks to freeze. My cousin is visiting for a few days and has offered to help me, so this will hopefully be a fun little activity we can do together.
My husband and I will also schedule a home food delivery for the day after we get back from the hospital. I might write out a grocery list for this delivery so my husband can just click and add the items to our online shopping cart easily from the hospital. I’m keeping things easy and frictionless, as I STRONGLY doubt I’ll have any interest in creating a meal plan after giving birth.
Organising support
I’m researching lactation consultants, baby groups, and keeping a list of emergency numbers nearby. I’m sure my brain is going to be all over the place and who knows how I’ll be feeling emotionally by the time baby arrives. I want to reduce stress as much as possible, so having a few things decided ahead of time will be greatly appreciated by future Melissa.
Lastly, this is a written promise I am making publicly to myself that if I end up doing absolutely NONE of what I’m about to share with you, that’s okay. I don’t need to make things harder than they need to be by beating myself up about not preparing well enough for postpartum.
This is something I want to do, because I will find joy in it. This is not something my perfectionist brain will use to make me feel inadequate. I plan on reminding myself daily that I’m doing a great job and it’s okay if my journey looks different than someone else’s highlight reel on Instagram.
I’m trying to make postpartum Melissa’s first few days of motherhood as smooth as possible. No big goals. Just a quiet season of preparation and compassion.
p.s. - if you’re a mom, whats your best advice in preparing for postpartum? Feel free to share in the comments below I would love to hear your experience 🤍
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Reading this brings me back to this time last year, when I was past my due date and waiting each day for my baby to come!
My recommendation is to do your best to relax and enjoy these slow, quiet moments before the chaos. Spend days on the couch watching shows, writing, or journaling. My mom stayed with us for the first 4 weeks postpartum and it was a HUGE help to have someone do the grocery shopping, cooking, and laundry.
You are so well prepared, and even so, things won’t go as planned! You’ll roll with it and take things as they come. ❤️
You are already so ahead of the game and doing amazing! The meal prep is huge and will save you a lot of time and cleaning. My favorite thing I prepped this time around were chocolate walnut cookies - love that you can just throw in a couple of cookies from the freezer at a time. My biggest piece of advice is to be kind to yourself. You are bringing new life into the world and it’s the most beautiful thing so makes sense it’s also challenging. It really does go so insanely fast so during the harder days and sleepless nights, keep that in mind. Your body is doing SO much even after and hormones take time to go back to normal, so it’s completely ok and normal to have days where you feel like you haven’t done anything at all. Thinking of you and sending you good energy for a healthy, speedy delivery and smooth recovery process. You’ve got this ♥️