So, I'm a mom now

Motherhood: Chapter One

I’ve snuck away to write this to you on what feels like stolen time, because exactly three weeks ago, I became a mom. On the 30th of March, my husband and I welcomed our beautiful baby girl Louise.

Admittedly, I have felt pressure building up to perfectly articulate what I’ve experienced these last few weeks in this newsletter: the first one after having a baby. However, the lack of sleep combined with baby brain means that this will probably be short and sweet (and filled with grammatical errors!!).

I refuse to let perfectionism get in the way. I am returning to writing, even if it’s a few hundred words scribbled down in my notes app in between feedings and naps.

The last few weeks have been a blur. I don’t think I’d even remember any of it if I hadn’t taken approximately one thousand photos of my daughter and logged every nap, feed, and nappy change into the Huckleberry app.

I’m endlessly grateful for my husband who has been so supportive and helpful. One of the best parts of this whole experience has been watching him become a dad. I’m also beyond blessed that my own mother travelled over from America to stay with us for a few weeks to help us out and get settled. I’m already getting teary eyed thinking about the upcoming goodbyes that are immanent.

Recovering from birth is no joke. It’s been three weeks and I’m just now feeling ever so slightly back to normal… well, my new normal. I’ve been sharing on Notes about my daily postpartum walks in the evenings that have seriously been helping me out so much. Sundown scaries are real. Fresh air helps.

These tiny self care moments are saving the day. Making sure I let my mom or husband take Louise for 10 minutes in the morning so I can have a shower. Going into another room for 45 minutes at night while Louise is napping so I can have a cup of tea and a sweet treat while watching an episode of my show (currently watching Something Very Bad Is Going To Happen on Netflix).

Overall, I love being a mom so far. I’m in love with my baby girl and watching her grow big and strong over the last few weeks has been such a joyful experience. At the time I’m writing this, I’m exclusively breastfeeding (which has been its own journey) and feeling so bonded to this little being we brought into the world.

In many ways, having Louise has been healing. I can’t really describe it properly right now, but feeding her has been healing for both my mind and body after pregnancy and birth.

I love learning something new about her each day. I’m so grateful she is happy, healthy, and thriving. I cherish being needed by her. I miss her when she’s asleep. She’s all I think about right now. The baby bubble has been so beautiful and I’m already nostalgic for it.

As a perpetual overthinker, I am trying so hard to just be present and enjoy the ‘right now’. It’s really a beautiful moment in time. I’m gripping onto it with all my strength.

Anyways, I can hear baby girl waking up. Thank you to everyone for the congratulations and kind messages. It’s the beginning of a brand new chapter.

I’m a mom now.

Thanks for reading Keep This In Mind. If you enjoyed this newsletter, I’d truly appreciate it if you subscribed, liked, shared, or left a comment. You being here means so much to me!